(I realize that some readers [who have a very good taste in literature] may notice this topic in a book by Scott Adams. Full credit for the idea goes to him. Although I could claim that it's different because he wrote about TEN fears, not five. So really, I'm doing him a favor.)
1. Fire, earthquake, bombings, hurricanes, the Rapture, the Sun exploding, tidal waves, and all disasters which I have no control over. When I lie in bed at night and find myself excruciatingly bored but for some reason unable to go to sleep, I often find the slightest noise such as the incessant ticking of the clock to sound exactly like someone yelling at me about some sort of tidal wave/bombing/fire/earthquake that is occurring right this instant. This is most likely the most evil, annoying, and (although it hurts my pride) frightening thing that I have ever encountered.
2. Giant spiders. This is going to take some explaining. When I was young, around five or six years old, I suddenly developed an irrational fear of the "enormous daddy long-legs" sitting just beyond the shower curtain, waiting to pounce. noticing the action of smaller spiders when suddenly exposed to light, I always turned on the light for the bathroom AND the light for the shower. This, I reasoned, would scare the spider away. It developed into a bad habit, a habit I carry to this day.
3. My cat. One night a while back, I got up to refill my water bottle and go to the bathroom (the two were probably linked somehow), I tripped over a huge furry lump and had several heart attacks and a stroke before I realized that it was just my cat, Ginger. Ginger was quite thin when we got her from the shelter, but now she is pushing the size of the Chrysler Building (hyperbole). Ever since, I open the door very slowly at night to make sure she isn't waiting right outside. I also spend the minimum amount of time in the 2-and-a-half-foot stretch between my bedroom and the bathroom. That requires me cutting down on my time worrying about giant spiders.
4. Norovirus. This is time-specific since it is a epidemic at my school which cannot last forever. But at the moment, half the school is out with a extremely violent stomach flu, or as the cautionary fliers say, 'Norovirus'. If you ask me, that makes it sound a lot worse. Like it's not just a stomach bug, but a stomach bug that steals your possessions, eats all your food, replaces you brain and vital organs with clever play-doh models, and scrambles your auto-dial list. I am very lucky not to have been infected yet, and I think that the virus is finally coming to pass. But you never know...
5. Running out of books. Books are basically 50% of my entire life. I live for books. If I ran out of books, 50% of my life would be over. I'd trip over a rock and bleed to death. I have so many books that I recently moved several boxes of books into the garage and I still have books overflowing out of the closets on the floor. I have read at least 80% of them. The others are either books I started and didn't like (15%) , the 0.01% that are books that I have overlooked, and the rest are invisible or utterly and completely destroyed. At some point I'm going to run out of viable books. But by that point I hope to be either a) able to write my own books or b) dead.
That covers it. Another blog post, maybe the next one, will be about five fears I used to have. Lord knows that will be interesting.
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